Post Your Entry!
Freudian slips, oft they have been my demise. That slip of the tongue that lets the listener know my true intent, an intention of which I seldomly knew of myself - only realizing it at that moment. They used to happen rarely, though lately I'm finding I'm making more and more slips. Actually, that's a bit of a lie. I was making many slips, and then those declined, to later be replaced by something else, to be discussed in a moment...

Me: I love being amongst the pubic.
Friend: Pubic?
Me: Public!

Me: I want to make love with you.
Friend: What?
Me: Gloves! I want to start a glove manufacturing company with you.

Admittedly, those are horrible horrible attempts at humor - only since I do not wish to pubicly admit my more embarassing Freudian slips. Yet as the years go by, and the trees undress, removing their leaves, I find that in my older age, I'm not making Freudian Slips so much as I am making, for lack of a better term, I will hereby coin: Freudian Correction.

What are Freudian Corrections? Consider them the reverse of a Freudian Slip. Where a Freudian Slip is when one meaning in your sub-conscious replaces the meaning in your conscious, causing you to say revealing statements about yourself, a Freudian Correction is in which you actually stated your conscious meaning, but then your subconscious lies to you by telling you that you made a Freudian Slip, so you say what's in your subconscious, only to later realize that you had it right the first time, and thus need to correct a second time. That's a verbose way of saying what I can say through example:

Me: I'll admit, I'm a bit of a drama queen...
Friend: Oh I...
Me: Err... sorry, drag queen.
Friend: What?
Me: Aahhhhh, I mean drama queen!

Why? Why is my brain revealing more and more as I get older? Why is it no longer making an attempt at hiding my inner most desires?

What next? Overt Freudian Admissions?

Me: I gotta admit, that tree is looking pretty hot.
Friend: ...

Followed by Freudian Assertions?

Me: Damnit, I'm serious... look at junk in that tree trunk!
Friend: I'm leaving now.

Followed by Freudian Philosophizing...

Me: I'm not seeing the forest for that sexy, sexy tree.



I don't know how you do it, but you always manage to weird me out more and more...

Forget your password?
Don't have an account? Sign Up, it's free!
Most Discussed Articles Top Articles Top Writers